There’s a peculiar arithmetic used by many mothers I know, myself included on a bad day: help received feels like a debt, help given feels like an obligation, and somehow both columns end up in the red.
Written by
Nicole Backhouse
I dreamt of being a psychiatrist but became a lawyer by mistake; I retrained as a psychotherapist and have never looked back.
My writing
Get My Writing by Email
[One line on what people get, and how often.]
Keep reading
More from the Blog
Therapy
· 2 November 2026
Why ‘I’m Fine’ Is Keeping You Lonely
What hiding costs us, and the quiet courage it takes to stop. Most of us learned early, and learned well, that it was safer to ‘seem fine’. Back then, this may have kept us safe. Later on, it just keeps us lonely.
Therapy
· 20 October 2026
In Arrears: Depression, Gratitude and the Guilt In Between
Why “I should be grateful…” can become one more thing to feel bad about. Depression tends to leave the knowing intact and strip out the feeling, and the mind goes looking for an explanation.
Teenagers
· 9 October 2026
Therapy for Teenagers: When It Helps and How to Choose Well
Most parents arrive at the idea of therapy late, and often sideways. What every parent should know before they need it: when good therapy is worth the investment, and how to tell a good therapist from one who will waste your money and your child’s trust.
Getting started
The first step is to pick up the phone or drop me a line
Simple. No pressure, let’s see what happens…
